September 17, 1983

“I, Doug, take you, Karen, to be my wedded wife, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part…”

“I, Karen, take you, Doug, to be my wedded husband, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part…”

February 2013

“Karen, you have cancer…”

Doug had the opportunity to make good on his “… in sickness and health…” vows. I was diagnosed with an aggressive cancer. He stood by me and served me through thick and thin. Hair and no hair. Chemo and surgery. Tears and hugs. Today, six years later, I can confidently declare I have beat that dreaded disease! I am well. I greatly admire Doug and all he did for me on that journey.

March 2019

Now it is my turn to serve…

It is my opportunity to make good on my “… in sickness and health…” vows to the man I love and cherish.

February 2016

We started to notice “things” weren’t quite right. I thought maybe vitamins, nutrition, or exercise were the culprits. Fluent tasks, which Doug had never struggled with before, were occasionally popping up as challenging. A flight was missed, a conversation was repeated, a card game was scrambled, a sermon was cut short… all things easily dismissed, justified, and ignored.

We decided a blood test was in order. It came back normal. We went back to normal. Time passed.

We decided a second set of blood work should be done. It came back normal. We didn’t go back to normal. Time passed.

An MRI was done. No stroke… No brain injury… No tumor… No significant brain shrinkage… Normal…

Problem-solving tasks were becoming more laborious.

Words were being repeated.

Thoughts were sometimes tangled.

Traveling directions were misunderstood. Getting lost was the result.

A darkness of anxiety lurked in the shadows, surfacing unannounced at any time, only to bury him in confusion.

Neurology was next. Dr. Lipiz joined our team. His office is a two-hour drive inland towards L.A. He came highly recommended. Testing was done…

MCI -Mild Cognitive Impairment was diagnosed, and the word dementia was ping-ponged into the conversation. I was feeling anxious at that point. Additional testing was prescribed. Again, time passed.

Neuropsychology was next. Dr Barrera at Loma Linda University joined our team, and Doug bravely undertook a series of difficult and cumbersome diagnostic assessments.

March 13, 2019

Diagnosis –

Doug, the man I vowed to love and cherish in sickness and in health… is descending down the road of early onset Frontotemporal Dementia. Sadly, he is in the Moderate stage with rapid progression. There is no cure. Our lives are changing.

2013, I started a cancer blog (Dancing with the King). It was my way to interact with family, friends, total strangers who became friends, and just total strangers.   It became a journal of the journey. A place where I could share my thoughts and feelings so others could know and take comfort, or take whatever from it, along the way.

Doug is aware of the diagnosis. He is very aware of the implications and their impact on him, us, and our family. He has asked me to blog his journey. He wants you to know what it is like to be him, me, and us. So here it is. Doug’s dementia blog: “As it is in Heaven.”

The title comes from a song by Hillsong United. The lyrics:

“Whether now or then,

Death is not my end

I know Heaven waits for me…

…And while I’m waiting,

I’m not waiting,

I know Heaven lives in me…

…Should I suffer long

This is not my home,

I know heaven waits for me…”

If you would like to follow this journey, the blog will be a regular post every other month or so. You can connect directly to it by going to www.asitisinheaven.blog. I will post it via social media as well.

We are expecting many good days, months, and even years ahead of us, and we are expecting hard ones as well. We trust God in this tapestry that is being woven. His will is our will.

If you know Doug and share fond memories, he would love to have you share them with him. A contact tab is attached to the blog where you can connect and share a memory, a thought, a laugh, or whatever you’d like. We would love to hear from you.

Living in peace one day at a time,

“…We’ll sing Holy, Holy
The earth, cries Holy
As it is, in Heaven
So let it be…”

Doug and Karen